I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
Saw 2 lesbians fist fighting outside the bar tonight. I was startled yet slightly turned on
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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