i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Semen is not good for contacts.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize
