WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
U sent me lyrics to wind beneath my wings
My liver misses your liver
In order to get rid of my bladder infections I must give up caffeine, nicotine and tight pants. It's like my pussy is an angry dictator or something
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