STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I hate when my naked walk-arounds are interrupted by someone knocking on the door
only you would photoshop your dick
Just saw an old man buy two cases of keystone light, a case of milwaukee's best and a case of icehouse. Degenerate alcoholic of senior citizen of the year?
I'm so glad i pay social security
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
If I remember correctly I tried to steal a mail truck last night
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
I have post one night stand depression
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