i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
Just looking for some anal play. An attempting to read atonement. The highbrow/lowbrow divide is striking.
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
This is a whole new generation of premature ejaculators
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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