I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
She said her name was "party"
i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
You were up on table in a neon bra chanting "YOUR MOM" while drizzling vodka on your chest...
no wonder i woke up with my boobs stuck to my bra
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