THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Sharing a bathroom with a guy sucks. I always have to set an alarm for the middle of the night just so I can take a dump. Poop text btw
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I feel like I just did it with Buster from Arrested Development. Taking a shower. #winefail
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
Randomize
