last week i woke up at this guys house...this week i woke up at his ex girlfriends
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
She has her iPod in her ears slippers and sweats on and is walking around the house up and down the stairs getting "exercise" she just stopped for a water break
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
You seriously don't remember crying about how much you miss your mom right before we hooked up?
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
We shall need something stronger. Anal lube, the blood of a giraffe, and a bay leaf should do the trick. Make the paste and cover your left knee and anus in it.
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
Randomize
