therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
I can't come tonight. Someone took a shit in the dressing room. A.) Clean it up or B.) Kill myself. Text back with your answer.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Randomize
