I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
Randomize