i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
Dick very happy bro
Even after hearing me fuck his friend twice in one night, he still follows me around like a puppy.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize
