so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I would like you to know I am eating your apology chocolate, which means i forgive you for puking everywhere before formal
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Randomize
