im gay
i know
yea but for you.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Watching her eat just hurts me
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
Sounds like she has 4 first names. Like a sad version of Ricky bobby
I'm worried about how taking care of my mom's dog while being on acid will go.
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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