I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I hate you so much right now. You got us kicked out of my favorite bar because your drunk ass was hogging the Bluetooth jukebox and would play NOTHING but that goddamn skeleton song. IT'S NOT EVEN OCTOBER YET.
Spopky scrzy skeletonssz
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
And now to play every stoner's favorite game: Where the Fuck Did We Park the Car?! Disneyland Edition!
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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