Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
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