his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
My history with restaurant waiters is severely limiting our dinner options.
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
Guess what happened to me today at work?
I have chlamydia. What happened.
Oh lets talk about your news first. Mine is happy so it should go second.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
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