There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
I can't believe im sexting my roommate. This is really what my life has come to
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Randomize
