I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
God if that man would just have sex with me every time I got mad life would be so much easier...
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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