I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
youre so sexy i want your bod
dude, did you turn gay?
this is jacob
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan