What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
after he fucked me and not his girlfriend, i told him to be a gentleman and close his eyes as i ran to the bathroom naked. so sweet.
your definition of "gentleman" is so absurd.
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Dear lord though. So much glitter. It's just a big gay explosion and all of my whore muscles hurt.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Randomize
