Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(416): View more from Ontario

i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .

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(416): i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high . http://tfl.nu/d43n

Replies (17) Good night (2932) Bad night (556)
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(905): View more from Toronto

I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it

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(905): I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it http://tfl.nu/jng0

Replies (32) Good night (4374) Bad night (1936)
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(231): View more from Michigan

I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.

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(231): I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out. http://tfl.nu/21gu

Replies (12) Good night (3735) Bad night (1123)
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(314): View more from Missouri

he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.

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(314): he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it. http://tfl.nu/pdii

Replies (9) Good night (860) Bad night (4643)
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(250): View more from British Columbia

He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...

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(250): He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock... http://tfl.nu/tura

Replies (15) Good night (5712) Bad night (1394)
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(313): View more from Michigan

he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with

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(313): he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with http://tfl.nu/73j2

Replies (6) Good night (3172) Bad night (944)
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(919): View more from North Carolina

Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician

(919): View more from North Carolina

3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.

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(919): Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician (919): 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician. http://tfl.nu/iajm

Replies (10) Good night (2184) Bad night (675)
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(516): View more from New York

PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.

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(516): PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated. http://tfl.nu/z915

Replies (4) Good night (1415) Bad night (507)
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(920): View more from Wisconsin

Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?

(1-920): View more from Wisconsin

Yes and yes

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(920): Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend? (1-920): Yes and yes http://tfl.nu/cdzo

Replies (5) Good night (2132) Bad night (771)
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(+34): View more from Spain

First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?

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(+34): First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here? http://tfl.nu/wg03

Replies (8) Good night (2251) Bad night (929)
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(505): View more from New Mexico

I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...

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(505): I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory... http://tfl.nu/vjel

Replies (10) Good night (2977) Bad night (526)
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(308): View more from Nebraska

In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge.

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(308): In the last 3 months, I've slept with an ex,someone single, someone in a relationship, someone married, and someone divorced. I should get some type of grown up girl scouts badge. http://tfl.nu/2ycl

Replies (22) Good night (1527) Bad night (665)
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(614): View more from Ohio

You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.

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(614): You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning. http://tfl.nu/s4j6

Replies (14) Good night (1484) Bad night (631)
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(347): View more from New York

She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.

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(347): She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty. http://tfl.nu/vxvx

Replies (0) Good night (428) Bad night (481)
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(601): View more from Mississippi

Did you feel uncomfortable?

(1-601): View more from Mississippi

For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.

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(601): Did you feel uncomfortable? (1-601): For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch. http://tfl.nu/qfar

Replies (0) Good night (472) Bad night (204)

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