i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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