what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I am about to get in a knife fight over a corn dog.
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
I just farted a soft, gentle fart and it made me think of the eye puff glaucoma test at the eye dr. I hope that's not fart air they use for those. And yes, I'm texting you from the toilet and yes again, I'm high.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I woke up in my bed with candy and beer bottles all around me and i dont know where any of it came from. I love valentines day.
Randomize
