For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was tug of war between me and the cop. He wanted the beer, I wanted the coozie.
How long after mardi gras is it considered okay to wake up topless and wearing beads?
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Yay for living on the edge. I'm trying this new thing where I stop mom-arming people and promote bad decisions. It's working quite well.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
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