I have the worst farts today, I'm walking by the cubicles of people I don't like and leaving them surprises. Brb.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
Writing a love song to planned parenthood. what rhymes with "don't have AIDS"
I need a hobby that doesnt involve alcohol and my tv
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
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