Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I'm going to fuck him so hard that his dick is going to fracture
Glad to see your being a lady about this
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Don't byou dare ruin egg salad by putting your penis in it that would be so sad.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
What does puking wasabi feel like?
Like snorting cocaine backwards.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Being an adult can't be all bad. I just took a vacation day solely to sit around and get stoned
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
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