Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to an alarm on my phone that said "Buy Plan B" and then the guy offered me a hairbrush... which seemed polite at the time
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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