Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I woke up this morning with a hospital armband on containing all the information off my fake i.d. WTF did we do last night!?!?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize