new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
