and we just had intercourse last night so i'm exhausted, fucked up on adderol, emotionally broken and just pissed
youre lurking in front of me
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
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so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Also I'd like you to set a calendar reminder that goes off every day for you to take 2 minutes to think about what your life would be like without me.
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Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Part of me was thinking I should go old school and get a chasity belt before the semester starts. Really lock that shit down. But then I thought, fuck that. I'm going to hit that campus like an f5 whorenado
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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