do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
I've carried my liver for over 24 years. If it can't carry me for the next 24 hours than it deserves to be damaged.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Her roommate was talking on her cell when I came out of the bedroom and I definitely heard her describe how shitty and terrified I looked. Awesome.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
Nothing screams "crazy cat lady" like a nursery in your house when you're over 30, single and have no kids.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
