To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
I won the booty shaking contest by mooning the whole bar
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
Randomize
