Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
