Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
It is a special kind of bonus when you find money you hid from yourself when you were drunk in the tampon box. What did we do last period?
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
