Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
Randomize
