How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I just went on etsy and my personalized suggestions on the page were either kinky sex restraints or baby things. I feel like etsy just summarized my life.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
Randomize
