She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your philanthropy is ruining my sex life.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
You would be too ashamed to ever love me again if you saw the filth I just created. It brings unspeakable dishonor to the nacho dynasty. Like I raped the king's daughter, cut off her hands and made him eat them that's how hard I fucked up nachos.
im starting to recognize places in this city by where i have drunkenly peed in public
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
She's been with the dude for a week saying she's in love. Yeah so am I. I just opened this beer 5 minutes ago and I LOVE IT ALREADY.
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize