your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Well I'm 2 for 2 with the absinthe, I just woke up in some random car behind the bar
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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