I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
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