Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
Good Morning! You are sterile right?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
Randomize
