Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
He asked me when I was coming to bed while simultaneously drilling a fart into the mattress. Don't fucking get married.
Bring my gorilla suit and my bong.
Oh its going to be that type of weekend?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Just remember, the Browns have more wins than Ronda Rousey this year.
Randomize
