Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Is Oprah even human
what are you getting to drink for new years?
well seeing as how i just got diagnosed with a uti, whatever we can mix with cranberry juice
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
Randomize