No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
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Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
we broke the bed, curtan rods, a dresser drawer, and unless I didn't notice it before, we put a hole in the wall. This is why he and I have to fuck in motels.
So apparently dinosaur erotica does, in fact, exist.
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
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