ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
Randomize
