guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
This shit I'm taking feels like I've eaten every burrito in the world and chased that with an aquarium of hot sauce.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
Of all the kinds of relationships I've had in my life, I'd have to say, lab-partner-with-benefits takes the fuckin cake
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
Randomize
