It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
Randomize
