They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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