It's not a real calculator it's a math calculator
Just got caught pissing on a plant in her room while she was in the shower first word out of my mouth were my bad
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I can't believe I cried over a sausage mcmuffin.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Ran into his mom at the bar, i told her "i know he's married now but I'd still do him"
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
This past week everybody of fb either got rings or semen. All I got was Covid.
Randomize
