the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
Randomize
