anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
Just got a orange juice for my grandma, put gin in it without thinking. She's having a good morning.
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
my confident boosted when he told me that it was I who started making out with him. ME. NOT HIM.
I AM SHOCKED AND PROUD OF MYSELF
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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